2006 In The Village

Well, It’s the end of another year. Not a lot happened, again; but we have compiled a list of things anyway.
Most Talked about Woman in The Village: Mary Gilhooly – You could see a new spring in the step of every man in the village the day she paraded those new boobs in her tight pink top and you could hear the clunk of the jaw of every man in the village hitting the ground the day she moved in with that American lady.
Scandal of the year: Gary Cartey selling the sod of turf on E-Bay for 5 euro but charging 800 euro for postage to the States.
Entrepreneur of the year: Gary Cartey for selling a sod of turf to a yank on E-Bay for 5 euro but charging 800 euro for postage to the States.
To see more of this week's column check out page 6 of the Mayo Advertiser, www.mayoadvertiser.ie or get yourself a hard copy.

Whose turning Gay in the Village

The pink shirt and the roll neck jumper have been spotted on your clothes line today. You probably got them in the sales or something. Get rid of them within the next two weeks and nothing more will be said.

Happy Christmas

There was an awful poor crowd in Pa's last night Tommy. We're going to have to do something to resurrect the rural pub scene. I have a few ideas but we'll launch them in the New Year. I'm just about to square up to the ham and turkey roll, carrots and spuds Tommy. I'll be over later so leave the outside light on and have the kettle boiled for the hot whiskeys.

Days Gone By: A Christmas Story

Years ago Christmas was not the commercial extravaganza it is today. I hear some parents telling their young ones that if they are not good Santa will only leave a lump of coal in their stocking, well if Santa had left me a lump of coal I would have been the happiest ladeen in Ireland.We didn’t have stockings for our feet never mind to hang up on the fireplace. The only thing I got on Christmas morning was a kick in the arse from the old fella if I was late leaving for mass and.............
FOR MORE OF THIS WEEK'S COLUMN CHECK OUT www.mayoadvertiser.ie OR GET YOURSELVES A HARD COPY OF THE PAPER.